Now that his Mum is back at work part-time, I have started babysitting him one day a week. Plus the occasional overnighter.
I can't tell you how much of a delight it is to spend the whole day playing and taking care of him. It is the role I have been dreaming of for 4 years. And it feels SO good. It feels like exactly what I should and want to be doing with my life. It fits me to a tee!!
There are moments when I get upset that I don't have one of my own, and that I have to give him back and stop doing the baby routine. But mostly, it gives me such pleasure! He has kick started my exercise routine once again because I love taking him for walks in his pram! And I'm sure that spending time with him has also helped me to slowly begin to emerge from the 'funk' I've been in since the last miscarriage.
My niece, of course, knows all about our IVF journey (except for the last two failed pregnancies, those I haven't been able to talk to anyone about except for a small handful of my nearest and dearest). And she knows how much it means to me to be able to help her in this way.
So, whether or not we are successful in having our own children, I will always have her children to dote on and be a special person to them. And the biggest plus of all, is how much closer my niece and I have become since she became pregnant. It was then that I began sharing with her our difficulties, rejoiced with her for her pregnancy, and we started bonding on a different level. I am so grateful.
No comments:
Post a Comment