The next step toward parenthood

Friday saw us back to the fertility clinic for our OB appointment.  It was the first time we have ever seen a real hopefulness from her!  She has always been very supportive and encouraging and has always maintained our own sense of hope, but she was always conservative in her own beliefs for our success.  My age, history and her own experience of woman in their 40's was the reason for her conservativeness.

Now however, things have changed - both for her and us.  In the last two weeks, she has had success with another woman in my age bracket and she is so excited about it!  That, along with my last two natural pregnancies has given her much cause for hope and she is doing everything she can to try to reach another good outcome!  She is just as eager as we are to find that one, or two!, good embryos.

That gives us even more hope!

While my insulin tests are still in the normal range, they are on the high end.  Always on the cutting edge, our OB has been involved in new research that has shown that high insulin can be a factor in miscarriages.  So, I have been put on a low dosage medication to bring my insulin levels down.  The only problem is that I think I may be suspectible to the one side effect she mentioned - gastro.  Yesterday was my first day on the meds and last night showed an inkling of that side effect.  We will see how things go!!

Everything is in place now for our next ICSI round to begin when I start my next cycle.  Dave hit the road this morning for a two week work trip, so I will have to inject myself for a little while.  If I don't start for another week (which I am guessing will probably be the case), he will be back in plenty of time for his part in the process.  Otherwise he will cut his work trip short, which would be a real pain in the neck for him.  Fingers crossed the timing all works out for the best.

I am looking forward to starting again.  I really am hopeful and, no matter what happens during the round, I love being pro-active in our journey toward parenthood.  I love knowing that we are being treated and monitored toward pregnancy, taking out the random chance that we have lived with for so long.  Bring it on!!

Life has continued to be better for me.  I am still feeling much more energized and my enthusiasm for life is still growing back to its normal state!  I am grateful to be on the healing side of the last two miscarriages.

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So, now for the wedding picture!  I loved this spot and found it through another bride who got married at our venue a few weeks before hand.  The wedding co-ordinator said it was roughly "over there somewhere!!", so a week before our wedding, I went to the national park next to the venue and hunted through until I found this location just a short 5 minute walk away from the gate.

Briefly pregnant after wedding

As an adjunct to my post on our disrupted IVF round three, is a interesting little story!

We have some friends who were married a couple of years and are having some trouble trying to conceive as well.  Different circumstances as they are both young, but having trouble is still having trouble.

Anyway, R said to Dave one day, "there will be no pregnancy for you until there is a ring on your finger!"  He was joking mostly, but it was an interesting thing to say.  Sure enough, two weeks after our wedding, we got the phone call about the pregnancy.  Lets just ignore the fact the nurse also said that it wasn't looking good and she was right.

When we think back, we wonder if we conceived on our wedding night.  What a great story that would have been!  Three and a half years of trying and it took us to get married before got pregnant!

Even though it wasn't to be, I like to think that maybe there is some truth to R's half joking comment.  That now that we are married, will be the time for success!!!

Love and Light!

We're married!!

Amongst all the IVF things, Dave and I have been planning our wedding!!!  And on October 20, 2012, we finally did it! 

It was such an absolutely wonderful day!   Everything went so well, the day ran smoothly and we had a blast from start to finish!!

It is so exciting to be married to my wonderful man.  We both thought that things wouldn't be any different once we had tied the night.  But we were wrong.  We both felt it in the first week.  Things are better.  Something has shifted in our relationship and we like it so much better.  We can't pinpoint what it is, but we like it!

Perhaps it is because our relationship is now blessed, perhaps it is because it is now legal and official, perhaps it is the public affirmation of how much we love each other and how we will support each other, perhaps it is the public support of all our friends, perhaps it is the personal acknowledgment between us that we are forever.  Who knows!  
All I know is that I love it!!!!!!

We don't have our professional photographs yet, but I thought I would put up a few photos from our friends to give you an idea of our day.  Enjoy!

During the ceremony

My girls helping me

A pre ceremony moment

Me and my girls!

Post Ceremony happiness

The Ceremony Gazebo

Our Lookalike Clay Toppers

Anticipation

This is the first time in three years that I am looking forward to getting my period.  It’s really quite bizarre!  I am keen to get started on the IVF drugs and get a step closer to possibly being a Mum.

Although I have to admit, if it takes a few days, that will probably be a good thing.  I started the Curves Complete program today and a few days on the eating plan will hopefully put me in a better place to deal with the drugs.  I’m posting about my journey with that in my Creating Peaceful Thoughts blog.  It won’t be an easy one for me either, but it is a wonderful opportunity to get pro-active once again with my positive thinking.

I feel better today about starting my first IVF round.  Last night, I went to bed feeling quite good and woke up the same way this morning.  It has been a while since that has been the case.  I have a strong feeling of things happening as they are meant to.

For instance, one of my goals these last two months was to lose weight so that when I got measured for my wedding dress, I would be down a size.  That didn’t happen.  In fact, although I had lost a couple of kilos, the ladies at the bridal store felt that I would be better to go up a size.  What??!!  Well, they made sense.  The dress will look much better with the laces tied up closer together and it’s only a number after all.  The good thing about it.  I still want to lose weight, but having the next size up dress, will give me room to move if I am pregnant and bubby needs the space!  And if not, it can always be taken in.

So, I’m happy about that.  It’s meant to be this way.  Life has waited until today to bring me to a place of good dietary changes in order to make sure I get a dress size that will ensure I can still wear it when pregnant!

What a confusing and crazy life I am leading at the moment.  It is all over the place.  I am so grateful that my working hours are down this year, so I have time to deal with all of this.  Time to enjoy all of this.  I would be a mess working as I used to as well as wedding planning, baby planning, and healthy lifestyle planning.