Sunday, May 16, 2010

No more counting.

I have decided that as of now, there will no more counting how many cycles we have gone through without success.  It’s been over a year, so I’m done with that!  It’s really hard to do, but I am not thinking about what number this is at all!!

So, the good things about starting a new cycle…

It was my friends 40th birthday celebrations last night.  It was great to be able to enjoy a few drinks and relax.

I was able to poison the weeds in the garden today.  I won’t go near the poison at any other time than the first few days of a new cycle.  I am so glad to have gotten that job completely done.  There was SO SO many weeds coming up.  But no more!!
I hate to use poison, but in my yard at this stage, we have no choice.  We have talked about other options, such as weed mat etc, and hopefully we will get to that soon.

I’m not having an easy day of it today and am struggling with a few too many things at once.  One of which is that

I’m starting to think my body doesn’t know how to get pregnant.  I am ovulating, all my bits are in good working order, D is fine too and we cover my fertile period well. 


So, why no conception?

I am completely and utterly baffled.


But, I’m going to do the usual thing of one step at a time and see how well I can get through the rest of the day.


  1. Oh I don't know what to say really other than having struggled with the whole trying to have a baby thing I just feel for you and admire your courage in stepping forward and being determined to not let it get you down.

  2. I have to do that to my weeds too. They just spread like ground cover and are too hard to pull out by hand!

  3. When reading other blogs of women with fertility issues, do you prefer those that are optimistic and believe that it is going to happen, or those that express their feelings about not getting pregnant and are not sure that it's going to happen?
    I know of a blog that I wanted to tell you about, but I didn't know if you'd relate to it or not.

  4. Thank you AM - It is important to us not to let it get us down. And for the last few years, I have worked hard to try and stay positive. It's not always successful, but the effort is there!

    BV - ah, sounds just like my yard!

    Anita - I think both ways are good. The insecure "is it going to happen, why hasn't it happened" emotions are there and need to be expressed. But being positive, pro-active and accepting of the journey is important to me, even if I don't always get there!! lol The only blogs I struggle with are those that are constantly down and negative about the journey.

    If you think there is a blog that would like to tell me about, I would be most happy to hear about it. You can only try!!

  5. Sorry to hear that another cycle has come and gone for you. Keep thinking positive! Since everything tests out OK, have you thought about trying guaifenesin?

  6. I occasionally read a blog that I discovered via a national TV interview. It is
    Her latest post is one of another disappointment. You may want to say something to her...maybe not.

  7. I'm just catching up on your blog. Do hope you are feeling a little better by now. It must be like a roller coaster ride. The highs and lows of it all are so hard on a person. Take care of yourself. Sending HUGS.

  8. Mary - never heard the word guaifenesin. Will have to look it up!

    Thanks Anita - I will check it out.

    Feeling the hugs, Donna! Thank you.